CategoryHow to Assume Love

Angry at Your Inconsiderate Husband or Wife?


You’re rushing to prepare dinner for the family. You won’t be eating with them. You have an important meeting to attend. But it’s your responsibility to feed them, and you’re running late. The vegetable peeler is nowhere to be found. Not in the drawer. Not in the sink. Not hiding behind the chopping board someone left out. (And you know the kids don’t bother with...

The Loving Perspective, Part 5


Yesterday, in Part 4 of this series on how to explain a loving spouse doing something that upsets you, I wrote: “I am not talking here about pushing, shoving, hitting, cutting, damaging something especially dear to you, making remarks known to bring you to tears or render you helpless, or repeating angry outbursts or making threats until you fear being in the same room as your mate.”...

The Loving Perspective, Part 4


When you Assume Love, you try to explain how a loving person might come to do whatever your wife, husband, or life partner just did that upset you so. This series offers some tips to help when you just cannot get beyond, “It’s awful, I hate it, it must be intentional meanness.” First, we looked at Love Languages. Next, we looked at genetic differences in our ability to read each...

The Loving Perspective, Part 3


When you Assume Love and try to explain your husband’s or wife’s behavior as a loving act, do you draw a blank? We continue our series today with more tips for finding that explanation. On Sunday, we looked at Love Languages. On Monday, we looked at genetic differences in our ability to read emotional cues. Today, we look at the calendar. Are there days in your year with an emotional...

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The Loving Perspective, Part 2


When you Assume Love and try to explain it as a loving act, do you sometimes draw a blank? This series offers some guides you can use. Yesterday, we looked at using Gary Chapman’s 5 Love Languages. Today, we will apply some new research on emotions. Let’s imagine you just shared some news with your spouse, but the reaction is hardly the one you expected. It’s as if he or she...

Patty Newbold

I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.

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