When one of you is laid off or seriously ill or grieving a parent’s recent death, both of you get stressed. So does your relationship. Choose carefully how to deal with each other. The last thing you need right now is to do a kindness for the other that gets rejected or sneered at. If your husband or wife is working extra hours to make up for your loss of income, it’s kind to take on...
Living together can feel simpler and safer than marriage, especially if you’ve watched your parent’s marriage come to an unhappy end. But is it? Living together means you are free to leave. You are free to leave if either of you is seriously injured or is diagnosed with a life-altering disease. But so is your partner. You are free to leave if your trust is tested. And it will be in...
Do you have a brother-in-law or sister-in-law you can count on? How about a sibling of your mother-in-law? Thank your marriage. Do you have big, warm holiday dinners with your extended family? Thank your marriage. Or your parents’ marriage. Or your siblings’ marriages. Marriage ties the knots in the net that protects us when we fall and that gives us something to hold onto as we climb...
This is actually a great combo! Put it to good use. Revitalizing your relationship will take some effort. So would building a new life as a divorced person if you choose not to make that effort. Consider yourself lucky: you’re already doing all the chores, just like a divorced person must. You won’t be one of those people who abandons a relationship only to suddenly experience what it...
“It just struck me that hypothesizing about possible reasons for a spouse’s behavior could be seen by friends and other bystanders as making excuses for the spouse.” This is from a frequent Assume Love commenter, and I am thrilled she asked me to reply. Our purpose when we Assume Love and look again at why something upsetting happened is to get closer to the truth, not to make...
