Marriage and the Government


Who put the government in charge of marriage? Why do we need a license to marry? Why do we need a judge to divorce? In the US and quite possibly every other country, the government decides who is married and who is not. And it really doesn’t care whether you love each other, only whether you make a commitment that benefits your fellow citizens. In return, it offers you two some benefits and...

50th Anniversary


The summer after my sophomore year in college, I followed the man I’d met and fallen in love with ten weeks earlier to Bakersfield. We were talking at the park and found ourselves planning a fun 50th anniversary celebration. Only then did it occur to us that we were going to get married, because we would not know when to hold this wonderful celebration if we didn’t. Eleven and a half...

Happy Anniversary!


It’s Valentine’s Day, 2022. And the Assume Love blog is now Sweet Sixteen. I published the first post on Valentine’s Day in 2006. I hope that it’s helped you celebrate more happy Valentines Days since then. Happy seventh anniversary to my cousin’s daughter (my first cousin once removed) and her marvelous second husband. What a great choice of wedding days. And (this...

Big Changes at Assume Love


We have a new web design coming very soon, complete with all 15 years of Assume Love blog posts. I have added a search function and other goodies and made the site much easier to read on a smart phone or tablet. And if you are one of the hundreds of folks who subscribe by email, watch for an email in a few days from Patty Newbold, Assume Love Blog (newsletter @ It will be...

For marriage book reviews and books by Patty Newbold, the author of Assume Love, visit:

Patty Newbold

I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.

Assume Love in Your Inbox!

Read About

Recent Comments

Popular Posts

Visit Patty’s Other Site

Enjoy Being Married logo


Social Media