I am a worrier. A world-class worrier, I suspect. My father taught me well: always ask, “What if?” MIT taught me well: they gave me a degree in Planning. But my native curiosity and imagination were probably more than enough on their own. The other night, I was sitting on the sofa beside my husband when I smelled smoke. I asked him if he smelled it. Nope. But, to humor me and out of a...
“My husband should eat better; I don’t want him to have a second heart attack.” “My wife should cook our meals and clean up after them; after all, I go to work everyday to support the two of us and our children.” “My spouse should speak kindly to me; Words of Affirmation is my Love Language, and I make an effort to come up with plenty of Acts of Service.”...
You’re overwhelmed. You need help. And, of course, it seems only fair and right and loving that the person you married should provide that help. But it doesn’t happen. You invited both families to a holiday dinner, but nothing went right in the kitchen, and nothing’s set up yet in the dining room. You holler for a helping hand and get told that your loving mate is taking care of...
Some of us are natural-born planners. Some of us are natural-born worriers. I am both. Perhaps you, too, are the sort of person who makes lists of criteria and starts calling housekeeping services weeks in advance of when you’ll need them. Or the sort who vets enough babysitters to know whom you will call if your favorite is not available on your birthday. Or the sort who gets an idea to...
My second of three journals has been published. This one is for anyone feeling disappointed or frustrated by their husband or wife. Are your needs going unmet? Do you feel you’re trying harder than your spouse? Are you carrying too much of the load in your marriage? Did you expect a gift you did not get? Loved: A Journal to Bring Joy to Any Marriage with Dashed Expectations and Unmet Needs...
I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.
