CategoryHow to Assume Love

Hidden Influences on Your Marriage

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We all have both explicit and implicit memories. The explicit ones we can generally retrieve on demand: who taught our 9th grade Algebra class, what the weather was on our wedding day, what we ate for breakfast this morning. Alzheimer’s erodes these memories, and we have none from our earliest years because our brains could not form them yet. The implicit ones are the hidden influences on...

When You Know You’re Right

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Have you ever had one of those discussions where you just know you’re right and your wife or husband is wrong? Not the sort where you debate whether Bigfoot exists or not, but the sort where you think it makes sense to buy a bigger lawn mower or to stay away from Aunt Zelda’s third wedding and you’re getting an argument. There are two ways to handle these. The most common seems...

Why Can’t You See This My Way? – Part 3

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In Part 3 of this series, I want to address a comment added to Part 1. I want to address it because I remember thinking like the commenter around a dozen years into my first marriage, and it kept me from fixing my marriage or even believing it could be fixed. Here’s the first part of the comment, which Matt wrote but so many others could have, too. Well, since this IS the assume love...

Two Great Reads

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I loved these. I think you might, too. Grace Full Mama blogger Joy wrote a post about her missionary pilot husband recently that just warmed my heart. He actually said he would rather his wife assume love than bake fresh bread for his sandwiches or clean the house! [Thanks to Lori, The Generous Wife for linking to both of us in the same blog post, because I had never seen Joy’s blog. Also...

For marriage book reviews and books by Patty Newbold, the author of Assume Love, visit:
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Finding Sense

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“Why doesn’t he lend a hand when I’m obviously overwhelmed?” “How could she spend money on this when we’re trying to save for a house?” “Why can’t he see the consequences of putting this off?” “What is she thinking when she leaves these here instead of putting them away?” In every marriage, good or bad, and quite frequently...

Patty Newbold

I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.

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