Five Ways to Screw Up a Holiday

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Here are five great ways to screw up a family holiday:

  • Overschedule yourselves, leaving no time to savor together the family gathering you worked so hard to create
  • Fail to notice your mate’s Love Language, whether it’s bringing something extra from the store as a gift, obsessing over the turkey as an act of service, or spending precious bonus time off from work trying to talk or do something together with you
  • Share your displeasure over the way things are going with what marriage researchers call a harsh startup, instead of first asking gently for whatever you would prefer
  • Agree to one thing (like gathering with your extended family) and do another (like watch football in the den while your mate cooks and your guests stew)
  • Take your spouse to visit your family and forget to create a few moments for just the two of you

Know how I know? I’ve lived every one of them. Here’s to a great Thanksgiving this year.

About the author

Patty Newbold

I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.

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By Patty Newbold

Patty Newbold

I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.

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