Tagdivorce

More on Turning Disagreements into Shared Victories

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How did you do with yesterday’s challenge to solve a toothpaste cap disagreement? A Third Alternative is a solution to your disagreement that will make both of you feel respected, loved, and in control of what matters to you. You create shared specs for your Third Alternative. They include the outcomes each of you values from your initial alternatives. They protect both of you from anything...

It’s Disgustingly Normal to Disagree

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Married couples disagree. The ones who stay married the longest disagree just as much as the ones who divorce. Disagreements become angry battles or festering resentments only when you fall into the trap of thinking a disagreement requires a choice between your two points of view. You start out thinking Option A vs. Option B. If you argue for Option A or Option B, you lose. Jump the net instead...

The Temporary Marriage, through a Child’s Eyes

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The marvelous Pam Slim, author of Escape from Cubicle Nation writes today about divorce through a child’s eyes. Pam is the mother of an adorable five-year-old now. Check out the photo of Pam at that same age, just before her father decided to find himself, minus the wife and kid, and how long it took Pam to find herself again as a consequence. She doesn’t mention if her father ever...

The Preventability of Divorce

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Whenever I declare that there are things worth learning about how to succeed at marriage, I risk offending good friends and even relatives who have divorced. Divorce is often painful, almost always life-disrupting. How cruel to even suggest it wasn’t necessary and the result of a bad match-up of partners. I was thinking about this earlier today and how similar it is to a business failure...

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Childhood Cancer Survivors Less Likely to Marry

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Double bad luck: people who have cancer as children are less likely to marry than those who don’t. Around 70% of Americans marry by the time they are 30 years old. But not childhood cancer survivors. Only half of them do, according to a large follow-up study reported today. Why not? Short stature, poor physical functioning, and cognitive problems are the factors more common among the people...

Patty Newbold

I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.

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