Tagassume love

U, Me, and the Donkey

U

What does it mean to Assume Love? Technically, it means to suppose, think, or guess, without proof, that someone loves you. It’s not a bad guess if that someone has stood in front of your friends and family and pledged to love you as long as you both shall live. And yet most of us are given to wondering if they still love us, given what they just did or said or failed to say. When we are...

Making Excuses

M

“It just struck me that hypothesizing about possible reasons for a spouse’s behavior could be seen by friends and other bystanders as making excuses for the spouse.” This is from a frequent Assume Love commenter, and I am thrilled she asked me to reply. Our purpose when we Assume Love and look again at why something upsetting happened is to get closer to the truth, not to make...

Let’s See How HE Likes It!

L

It seems to be a natural human instinct to turn the Golden Rule on its head and do unto others what we really did not like them doing to us. He left you waiting in a restaurant for 20 minutes? Surely he will straighten up and fly right if you show up late for the next thing he schedules. She rejects your foreplay? Just show her who’s boss by refusing to kiss her, hug her, or hold hands with...

Big Changes at Assume Love

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We have a new web design coming very soon, complete with all 15 years of Assume Love blog posts. I have added a search function and other goodies and made the site much easier to read on a smart phone or tablet. And if you are one of the hundreds of folks who subscribe by email, watch for an email in a few days from Patty Newbold, Assume Love Blog (newsletter @ enjoybeingmarried.com). It will be...

For marriage book reviews and books by Patty Newbold, the author of Assume Love, visit:
EnjoyBeingMarried.com

The Assume Love Philosophy

T

This, in a nutshell, is the Assume Love philosophy: put on your own oxygen mask before assisting others. In other words, don’t work on your relationship. Help yourself enjoy being married. What you do for your relationship when you enjoy it will never feel like work. Save your ideas for making your spouse a better husband or wife until you have fully opened yourself to receive the love...

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