Expect Love. Most husbands and wives enter marriage intending to give you lots of it. What happens? Why does it stop? Why is every day not as love-filled as our wedding day? It happens when we think we know what our spouses will do to show they love us. We think we know, so we look for that, instead of looking for any other form of love. We look for dinners we like, when we like them. When they...
Life demands a lot of us. A new baby, a new business, a move away from family and friends, a new boss, even a promotion can send us into overwhelm. Know what happens once we hit overwhelm? Our thinking switches to what Daniel Kahneman call WYSIATI—What You See Is All There Is. This leads us to an ugly place. Here is the trip as I have been known to take it. I am overwhelmed. Too much to do...
You have been working a brutal schedule, and you expect a little extra help from your mate. After all, you both benefit from the overtime or the raise that comes from your efforts. However, it’s dinner time, and nothing is ready to eat. What do you do? You can focus on the work. You do more. She should do more. Doing less? Unfair! You are mistreated. You deserve better! She has no respect...
Does it drive you bonkers that your husband never runs the vacuum cleaner just because it needs doing? Are you annoyed to tears when he steps over a bit of sock lint on the floor without picking it up? Do you start pondering divorce when he sticks flowers in a vase without first dusting out the inside of the vase? Are you furious if your husband brings home the wrong brand of diced tomatoes when...
The Five Love Languages illuminate so much of the craziness in marriage. This month, millions will try to buy gifts for their life partners. Some will give up before they start, utterly baffled by those of us who see love in a beautifully wrapped package of something just for us. Find them standing under the mistletoe, looking forward to the kisses, hugs, back rubs, and sex that say love to them...
