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Are You Being Taken Advantage Of?

Feel like you've got too much cooking and cleaning to do? Too much grass to mow? Too many chins to wipe? Too much responsibility for bringing in income? Wishing your husband or wife would pick up more of the load?

There are two ways to split responsibility with another adult. One is to divide it all in half. This is next to impossible, as the two of you look at the same situation and see differing responsibilities. And most of us do a terrible job at figuring out how many diaper changes equate to an oil change. You almost certainly end up resentful if you look at it this way.

The other way is to divide it into what you would need to continue doing if your wife or husband died tonight and what you do for love. You get to choose on any given day how much to do for love. And you can call on your mate at any time for help figuring out how to do more easily whatever you would need to do whether married or not. Works a lot better. You can't be taken advantage of.

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The Author

Patty Newbold is a widow who got it right the second time...

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