I Buried My Fears Today


Today, I went to the cemetery to plant some flowers on the grave of my first husband. This would have been his 60th birthday, except he died 25 years ago. While I was there, I buried my fears. I put them in the dirt under some petunias and left them there in New Jersey. As I dug out the weeds and readied the soil for the beautiful pale yellow and dark red-purple flowers I had brought with me, I...

Should I Stay Married for the Kids?


This question brings people to this blog from time to time: Should I stay married for the kids? They ask it of Google or Yahoo! or Bing and arrive here. It is a noble question, a sign of maturity even to ask it. I was once one of those kids for whom a couple stayed married, so I can tell you there are some real plusses. We continued to be able to afford a house and a yard in a good school...

Why Be Married? To Share the Load


Last night, I read this article in my alumni news about Lita Nelsen, MIT’s Director of Technology Licensing. She and her staff negotiate between faculty members, including Nobel Laureates, and the companies seeking to use their inventions. She graduated MIT ten years before me, when there were even fewer women in her class, only 22, so I know she must be pretty tough-skinned. It was the...

Are You Sorry You Married?


Are you sorry you said “I do” to the man or woman who shares your bed? None of us has any idea what we are getting into when we marry. Some get “for better.” Some get “for worse.” Some get “richer.” Some get “poorer.” Some get “sickness.” Some get “health.” Some of us get confused. I sure did. Confused about Why I...

For marriage book reviews and books by Patty Newbold, the author of Assume Love, visit:

Looking for Married Couples Between the Ages of 20 and 32


Catie W. O’Neal from the University of Georgia is conducting a study of gender roles in marriage. Can you help her? She is looking for married couples. Both of you must complete the questionnaire. And both of you must be between 20 and 32 years old. The information you provide will be kept confidential. Her project has been approved by Dr. David W. Wright, Department of Child and Family...

Patty Newbold

I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.

Assume Love in Your Inbox!

Read About

Recent Comments

Popular Posts

Visit Patty’s Other Site

Enjoy Being Married logo


Social Media