CategoryWhy be married?

Why Be Married? For the Kidney


Chip and Cindy Altemos of South Whitehall Township, Pennsylvania, have called off the divorce they both thought they wanted. A week after Valentine’s Day this year, Cindy gave Chip her kidney. According to an AP article on, Cindy said, “There was no way I could walk around with two kidneys and he had none. It was the right thing to do.” “Chip Altemos said his...

Why Be Married? For the Shopping


Last night’s cold rain kept most sane folks at home, but we needed food. Neither of us felt motivated to do it solo, so Ed and I went to the supermarket together. We shopped efficiently. He kept us moving briskly. I made sure we didn’t miss any staples or overlook a buy one get one offer on anything we bought. We each got only half as wet loading the bags into the car and carrying...

Why Be Married? For Love


I’m reading a history of marriage this week. Over the years, people have married to grow their labor force, to give another clan a reason not to attack them, to hold onto wealth, and many other reasons other than love. Even today in the Indian state my daughter-in-law comes from, love ranks as one of the most inappropriate reasons to marry. But here in the United States, it’s the...

Why Be Married? For the Lows and the Highs


A friend’s mother died last week. An only child, he would have been alone in sitting with her as she slipped away and in dealing with her death. But he wasn’t. He’s married to a wonderful woman who provided help and love during all of it. Being married softens the blow of our low points. It also enhances our high points. Last week, my husband, Ed, celebrated his birthday by...

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Why Be Married? For Mother’s Day


I had a great Mother’s Day weekend. Mom came for four days. My son and daughter-in-law came for an evening. Five friends joined us for brunch on Sunday, before we headed off to an outdoor festival. But it was my husband Ed that I noticed most. We have a small, efficient kitchen for one, and we seldom try to cook together. But that’s what we did for Sunday brunch. We know what sets...

Patty Newbold

I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.

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