When you Assume Love and ask how a truly loving husband, wife, or life partner could say those words, spend that money, or get that violent, beware of the alcohol explanation. Many people are quicker to anger and less diplomatic in their ways of expressing it when they drink. Most, however, cannot violate their own moral code even when drunk. If they would protect your college fund or your...
Emotional abuse is a serious problem in any marriage, whether you’re dishing it out or taking it. Dr. Steven Stosny developed a unique and highly effective way to help both the abusers and the abused. Until now, if you wanted to learn it, you had to get yourself to Maryland or hope he took his Boot Camp on the road to a city near you. I just received an announcement from him today of a Love...
What I did not get until my first husband died is how difficult relationships can be when you ask the wrong questions about them. Should Rihanna forgive Chris Brown is one of those questions. It takes you to all the wrong places, hides the truth you need to succeed. Should she forgive him? It will probably make her life a lot happier to do so. Should she be alone with him again? A very different...
Yesterday, in Part 4 of this series on how to explain a loving spouse doing something that upsets you, I wrote: “I am not talking here about pushing, shoving, hitting, cutting, damaging something especially dear to you, making remarks known to bring you to tears or render you helpless, or repeating angry outbursts or making threats until you fear being in the same room as your mate.”...
This issue always comes up during election years, doesn’t it? Some of us find the news that a candidate left his wife for his mistress a bad sign. Others want to forgive it as a mistake or simply keep everything about a candidate’s personal life off-limits. I would argue, though, that marriages matter. They are not entirely private. They are not entirely our own business. Yes, we make...
I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.
