You are not really safe if you’re sharing your life with someone who does not love you. You could be swindled. You might suddenly find your bank accounts emptied or huge credit card debts in your name or a big tax bill on income you knew nothing about.
You could find yourself alone in your now unfurnished apartment without a car or a clue where your spouse went or why.
You could find your nose bloodied in your sleep. Or your cognitive abilities damaged by a pot thrown at your head in frustration.
You might be arrested for complicity in a crime because you agreed not to ask what your mate is up to.
You could find yourself legally responsible for children fathered by your wife’s lover or trying to track down your own flesh and blood children in a foreign country where you can’t speak the language.
It’s big risk, sharing your life with another human being. And that is why we’re all hard-wired to be on alert for signs that we are with someone who does not care enough about us to protect us from harm. And why we need to enlist help to protect us whenever the danger is real.
But most mysterious behavior does not hide dangerous intent. That’s why a great marriage calls on us to be just as alert to signs of safety, of love, of respect, of caring, and of good character put to good use. It’s way too easy to overlook these signs, especially when anything (like political rancor, disease, war, mass shootings, or ridiculous heat) has us stressed.
Expect Love. Watch for it. Take comfort in it. And let your spouse know you noticed.