You are not really safe if you’re sharing your life with someone who does not love you. You could be swindled. You might suddenly find your bank accounts emptied or huge credit card debts in your name or a big tax bill on income you knew nothing about. You could find yourself alone in your now unfurnished apartment without a car or a clue where your spouse went or why. You could find your...
The Five Love Languages illuminate so much of the craziness in marriage. This month, millions will try to buy gifts for their life partners. Some will give up before they start, utterly baffled by those of us who see love in a beautifully wrapped package of something just for us. Find them standing under the mistletoe, looking forward to the kisses, hugs, back rubs, and sex that say love to them...
This one verse from Tony Arata’s song, a huge hit for Garth Brooks in 1990, says a lot about why I will always Expect Love and avoid defining how my marriage to Ed should unfold. And now I’m glad I didn’t know The way it all would end, the way it all would go Our lives are better left to chance—I could have missed the pain But I’d have had to miss the dance This is...
Have you got a marriage blister? That would be an irritation resulting from something that rubs you the wrong way, day after day after day. For example, you find a raised toilet seat offensive, and you have to lower it several times a day. Or you make the dinner and expect this means you will not have to wash any dishes, but they are still on the counter at bedtime at least every other day. Or...
Marriage brings with it responsibilities, disagreements, and unpleasant surprises. Some of them don’t make themselves known until you divorce or your mate becomes addicted to something. Thanks to the recently high divorce rate, marriage often means stepchildren, too, not to mention stepparents-in-law and your new half-brother-in-law’s son and stepdaughter. Lots of family drama...
I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.
