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Patty Newbold

I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.

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  • Patty, this is a great article!
    A very very important part of home buying IMO: buy a home that is far beneath what you can afford. Take the difference and put it into a monthly fund called your NO NAGGING FUND. Agree that your marriage will be nag free and that rather than nag anyone, you will take money from the NO NAG FUND to pay for lawn mowing, babysitting, housecleaning, someone to pick up the kids from school or any other chore neither person wants to do. It is the secret of my successful marriage.
    We bought a home that is 1/3 what we were approved for. We got it by cruising the low priced neighborhood we liked and leaving notes under the doors of homes with 1970s colored shutters i.e. likely original owners there, likely willing to move if we made the home selling experience easy and profitable. We were able to split the 6% RE agent fee- the sellers tacked 3% onto their rock bottom price and we agreed easily on the sale price.
    Living far below our means is the secret to reduced marital stress. If either of us is laid off, we can still meet our bills. We purchased all our furniture at consignment shops and thrift stores- thus giving our home a lovely, eclectic look that is quite welcoming. The majority of our expenditures is for healthy food and lots and lots of services that keep us from nagging each other :).Hiring someone to pick up the kids or do the lawn is always cheaper than a divorce!
    Susan

Patty Newbold

I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.

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