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In Case of Emergency

What would you miss most about your partner in life if he or she were in a coma? Her income? His cooking? The gentle touch of a hand on your cheek? The "I love you" every morning? The orgasms? The wise advice when you don't know what to do? The playfulness when you take yourself too seriously?

If you were keeping a journal in hope of someday soon sharing your thoughts during this awful time, what would you write in it?

If you were standing by your mate's bedside today, speaking gently and hoping to stir a recovery, what would you say?

Why are you waiting for a coma to reveal these most precious and intimate thoughts?


We really make an effort to do this several times a day, but it is always so good to be reminded of how precious life is. If CJ were in a coma, I might have to say something very ridiculous - perhaps I would sing one of the silly songs we have made up or a crazy adventure. Some things I am thinking of I just can't write online. ;)

I would call her the Bumblebee Woozle and see if that stirred her. It's one of the many ridiculous pet names I have for Tammy, but one of her favorites, I think.

For that very reason Patti we always try to honest and appreciative of each other and never let things go unsaid... especially given we've both had health issues in recent years.

For my part the thing I missed most when my husband was in hospital earlier this year was his true smile and the glisten in the eyes that went with it. Whilst he could smile that life and vitality that went with it weren't there and I could see the pain he was in instead despite his best efforts. So I would say that and just not having the freedom to go for our walks and hold hands. Knowing that you are both helpless and in the hands of care professionals makes you appeciative of all you have and so, whilst we always did before, we definitely make sure our words of love flow freely the second we feel them.

Big love

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Patty Newbold is a widow who got it right the second time...

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