Three Ways to Feel More Respected

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Here are three ways to notice a little more of the respect your spouse or life partner holds for you:

  1. Listen to what he or she reports to you about other couples. Negative comments about the abilities or reliability of friends’ mates probably mean yours are more impressive to your mate.
  2. Look beyond the words. Sure, driving tips sound like your driving skills are not respected, but when offered by someone who voluntarily and repeatedly gets in the car as your passenger, they are more likely just an outlet for nervousness.
  3. When listening to a complaint or warning, mentally make a list of bigger things your spouse or partner does not complain or warn about. As I picked up a babysitter years ago, her mother yelled after her, “Don’t run on the wet grass; you’ll slip and fall!” She groused about being treated like a baby. I pointed out that she was going off to be responsible for another person’s home and a child, alone away from her parents, and the only warning her mother felt she had to offer was don’t slip on the grass. That’s a huge degree of confidence.

About the author

Patty Newbold

I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.

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  • I am noticing that listening, reflection and less talking are big recurring themes in your posts. I love being around people who can do these things consistently.

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