There’s a new study out of UCLA making the media rounds. Doctoral candidate Justin Lavner and his psychology professor co-authors, Thomas Bradbury and Benjamin Karney, conclude that having doubts or hesitations about getting married increase the odds you will divorce within the first four years of marriage. They report that “wives who had doubts about getting married before their...
Think there’s something terribly wrong with your non-abusive marriage? Change that thought before it ruins a perfectly good day. Divorce does not magically make money troubles go away. In fact, it usually increases your total expenses and makes it harder to earn what you earn. Marriage counseling also costs money and doesn’t make more for you. And you don’t need to divorce to...
Yesterday, one of my Google alerts took me to this story about Usher’s divorce and child custody fight from WXIA 11 Alive News in Atlanta. It’s about an interview he did with Oprah Winfrey. I don’t have any other details of his life or his marriage, but several things in this interview cried out for comment. Why they married: “I impregnated this woman, we were in a...
Until a crisis erupts, it’s pretty easy to overlook many of the ways your spouse or life partner shows love for you. Pay attention to them now, and the crisis may never erupt. Which of these have you been receiving without noticing them? Trust for your driving, your fidelity while away from home, your care of the kids Respect when talking about you to others, asking your advice, relying on...
Is one worse than the other? Both happen when we don’t care about our mate or when we are so overwhelmed with emotions we feel entitled to or unable to control our awful actions. Surely, infidelity causes as much emotional pain as emotional abuse does. And because it can lead to deadly diseases or a fiercely angry lover or lover’s mate, it runs the same risk of permanent or fatal...
I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.
