Date Night and Love Languages

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Dating after you’re married is healthy and fun, as long as you’re dating the person you married! If you know your mate’s love language, you can make sure your date nights increase the love he or she feels from you.

  • Words of Affirmation – Start with a compliment on his or her appearance as you head out for your date. Write about your love on the paper tablecloth over dinner. Express gratitude for a character strength your spouse exhibits during the evening. If you head to a movie or a concert, include a stop for coffee or dessert, where you can share a few affirming words.
  • Quality Time – Make it clear in advance how important the time together is to you. Be ready on time. And be totally present, delegating your concerns your work or the wellbeing of your children to someone else for a few hours. Choose activities where you can interact or share a transcendent moment or belly laugh hand-in-hand.
  • Receiving Gifts – Pay for dinner or any entertainment. Keep your eye open for souvenirs of your date and present them during the date or right before bed. Consider window shopping, museums, state fairs, and other explorations of interesting and well-presented items.
  • Acts of Service – Be helpful. Offer to fetch the car if it’s raining or to carry something for your spouse. Consider dates where the two of you get to help others, volunteering with Habitat for Humanity, a local school or hospital, or a group serving the homeless or shut-ins.
  • Physical Touch – Go dancing. Take a massage class. Turn a candlelit dinner into foreplay. Hold hands or put an arm around your sweetie while you wait in line for souvlaki at the Greek Festival or a ride at an amusement park.

Marriage is not just about putting food on the table and turning a house into a home. It is about connecting with another human being on as many levels as you can. Create some new special memories by using love languages when you plan your next date night.

About the author

Patty Newbold

I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.

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By Patty Newbold

Patty Newbold

I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.

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