What If You Changed Your Definition of Fair?

W

If you changed your definition of fair, how would it change your marriage?
What if you decided dish washing, lawn mowing, meal preparation, shopping, laundry folding, and oil changing don’t belong in your definition of fair? Without them, how fair is your marriage?
What if you decided earning money has nothing to do with how fair your marriage is? Disregarding your incomes, your efforts to find a better job (or any job), how fair is your marriage?
What if you decided to measure how fair your marriage is on just one measure? And what if that measure was your spouse’s love language, whether that is touch, gifts, acts of service, quality time, or affirming words? How would the balance of giving and getting look if you did this?
Does your definition change on its own? Is it focused on chores when you really do not want to tackle the next one? Does it switch to pleasure when you’re wanting sex or a back rub that doesn’t lead to sex?
Yours is the only definition of fair creating your feelings of resentment or of being blessed from whatever is happening in your marriage. What if you decided to change it, on a trial basis, for the coming weekend?

About the author

Patty Newbold

I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.

1 Comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

  • Fair is the glue of all marriages but our society prevents this from being a reality unfortunately, destroying marriages thru local laws and biased judges in our courts and kicking good husbands out onto the street, broke and never to fall for this institution of unfairness again.

By Patty Newbold

Patty Newbold

I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.

Read About

Recent Comments

Popular Posts

Visit Patty’s Other Site

Enjoy Being Married logo

Archives

Social Media