Is Your Marriage Loud or Quiet?
Would a stranger observing the two of you call your marriage loud or quiet?
Loud is just fine if every angry outburst is matched with at least five exuberant or encouraging ones. How can you go from angry to encouraging? Assume Love.
Quiet is just fine if it's shared intimacy and respect, rather than passive-aggressive resentment. How can you go from hurt to grateful? Expect Love.
And how do you find your way to loud exuberance or quiet transcendence? Throw yourselves into synergy and building delightful new things together. How? Find Third Alternatives.
Yep. That's it.