Why Be Married? Because Love Happens All the Time, Everywhere

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Yesterday, the New York Times published Mona Simpson’s eulogy for her brother, Steve Jobs. I just have to reprint a few really important quotes from it today.

Steve was like a girl in the amount of time he spent talking about love. Love was his supreme virtue, his god of gods. He tracked and worried about the romantic lives of the people working with him.

I remember when he phoned the day he met Laurene. “There’s this beautiful woman and she’s really smart and she has this dog and I’m going to marry her.”

His abiding love for Laurene sustained him. He believed that love happened all the time, everywhere. In that most important way, Steve was never ironic, never cynical, never pessimistic. I try to learn from that, still.

“Love happens all the time, everywhere.” That was the part I failed to understand in my first marriage. I missed out on so much love because I thought I knew what my husband would do if he loved me. If we look for love only some of the time, in certain places (the lawn, the dinner table, the bedroom, the visits to your relatives), we can easily be fooled into believing we are not loved enough.
Love happens, all the time, everywhere. And it makes marriage one of the most wonderful things that happens to us in a lifetime.

About the author

Patty Newbold

I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.

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