Last Saturday, I received a wonderful treat in the mail. Seth Godin sent me an advance copy of his new book Tribes: We Need You to Lead Us, due for release on October 16th. In the tradition of his earlier books, it’s short, a great read, highly inspirational, and the sort of book that gets you thinking, rather than telling you what to do.
What it’s got me thinking of are ways to reach out to other wives and husbands and life partners who long to be well-loved. There are so many of us. Seth writes, “[i]t takes only two things to turn a group into a tribe:
- A shared interest
- A way to communicate”
I invite you to communicate with comments on this blog and by asking questions and sharing your viewpoints in the teleclasses I offer through EnjoyBeingMarried.com. Our shared interest, how to be well-loved, provides plenty to talk about. And we need each other, because it’s way too easy to slip into thinking the only answer is to turn our partners into someone other than who they are: the very people who committed themselves to us.
We need many leaders. We need family leaders, the folks who reach out to troubled spouses in their extended families to help them find their way through trying times. We need leaders among marriage educators and marriage counselors. We need leaders at work, too, who create marriage-friendly workplaces through policies and practices and training in the skills we need for relationships both at work and at home. Seth writes:
“Managers are the cynical ones. Managers are pessimists because they’ve seen it before and they believe they’ve already done it as well as it can be done. Leaders, on the other hand, have hope. Without it, there is no future to work for.”
Your job title might be manager (or trainer), but your role can be leader.
Seth also says:
“I think most people have it upside down. Being charismatic doesn’t make you a leader. Being a leader makes you charismatic.”
We need you to lead us. Read the book. Join the tribe of well-loved husbands, wives, and life partners. Stand up for lasting, loving relationships. Help those in your life to Assume Love, Expect Love, and Find Third Alternatives.