This Mess of a Marriage is Not My Fault!


This mess of a marriage we have is NOT my fault. Why should I be the one to change? I have heard this question from people who do not see why it would help to Assume Love, Expect Love, and Find Third Alternatives. I have even asked it myself before that horrible day that opened my eyes. So perhaps you ask it, too. Here’s the thing. Should is the wrong word. When you ask why you should be...

Four Ways to Look at Your Current Mess


Let’s say you intended to stay home with your babies, but now your full-time job is the only way to pay the rent and buy the groceries. Or perhaps you have a burning passion to launch a business, but it is not practical right now, because you want to be available to get your mate to dialysis appointments. Or you are this close to a college degree, but you cannot register for courses next...

Patty Newbold

I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.

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