As I wrote yesterday, I recently received a comment from Lorraine K, who wrote: Found your blog about a week ago and I have really learned a lot. I am wondering about third alternatives for future relationships because my S.O. and I broke up over two issues that I now think may have been avoided if we had found Third Alternatives. The first issue was about a few of his rude friends. My boyfriend...
I recently received a comment from Lorraine K, who wrote: Found your blog about a week ago and I have really learned a lot. I am wondering about third alternatives for future relationships because my S.O. and I broke up over two issues that I now think may have been avoided if we had found Third Alternatives. The first issue was about a few of his rude friends. My boyfriend didn’t want to...
I received a wonderful comment this weekend from Duane on my 2012 post, One Last Stand Before Divorce. After 24 years of marriage, his wife left for her mother’s house. She said she loved Duane but was no longer in love with him. He found this blog, Assumed Love, made a bunch of changes, and three months later, he says, “We spent the whole day together and at the end of the day she...
Are you separated? Thinking of cheating on your husband? Or still living with your ex-husband but seeing someone else? There’s something you ought to know. While you’re married, and even for 300 days (10 months) after your divorce is final, most U.S. states and the U.K. presume your husband is the legal father of any child you give birth to. This is true even if some other man you are...
I read about some interesting research recently that relates to Finding Third Alternatives. It showed just how much people like agreement and, even more, dislike impasse. Just labeling an option “Agreement” made people in a negotiating experiment more likely to choose it, even if it wasn’t their best option. But labeling an option “Impasse” had a bigger effect...
