What’s reasonable to expect from a husband? Or a wife? I had an interesting discussion recently with two single women. I told them I believe one of the keys to a great marriage is to expect only love. Well, of course they both expect love. But only love? Shouldn’t we expect fairness? If one cooks, the other cleans up? Unless there are kids at home to care for, both work? If she does...
On February 17th, I was interviewed on Barbara Sher’s Live the Life You Love web radio show. Barbara is a wonderful interviewer, and the hour turned out to be great fun for me. The interview is all about how to Assume Love, Expect Love, and Find Third Alternatives and why these help us Enjoy Being Married. To listen, click on the link above and look for the 2/17/2008 show. You can play it...
Valentine’s Day is a magnificent day to expect love. Especially if you’ve had marriage problems recently, avoid the trap of expecting chocolates or dinner or jewelry or something romantic. Your chances of expecting the right thing are tiny. Your chances of missing out on love when you expect some particular sign of it are great. The best gift you can give your husband on...
What an honor it is to walk into someone’s life at just the right moment. I had a chance recently to talk about assuming love, expecting love, and looking for the third alternative with a woman ready to toss in the towel on her marriage. Recent life events had created a lot of tension between her and her husband of twenty-plus years. Like me when I was 34 years old and frantic, she’d...
How to feel more loved every single day: 1 – Assume love. When your spouse’s or life partner’s behavior upsets you, stop, assume for the moment he or she is still the same wonderful person and still loves you very much. Now try to explain how he or she might have done this if this is true. You’ll stop your knee-jerk reactions long enough to see the situation a lot more...
