When you’re in a marriage, you cannot ever win a fight with your husband or wife by shouting louder, being tricky, offering more rational explanations of your side, or marshaling friends and relatives to agree with your point of view.
You cannot win by causing the person you married to lose. The only way to win is to make sure both of you come out the other side pleased with the outcome. Otherwise, you gain some small victory at the cost of the intimacy, love, and respect you both need.
If finding outcomes like this is a challenge for you, I encourage you to read the How to Find Third Alternatives posts on this blog or to purchase a book I wrote just for you, Agreed: A Journal to Bring Joy to Any Marriage with Too Many Disagreements [As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases]. It includes helpful worksheets and easy-to-follow instructions for finding your way to satisfying agreements without bullying, going along to get along, or compromising, plus a one-year journal for discovering how much you two agree on.
