Gifts

G

Best-selling self-help author Barbara Sher always said, “You cannot be modest about your gifts, because that’s arrogant. They aren’t yours. You didn’t think them up and work for them. They were there when you were born.”

You can’t be proud or ashamed of being tall. It wasn’t you who did that. But when someone short needs helping reaching something, you owe it to them to use your gift of height to help.

Your other gifts, those things you do so easily and just love to do? You owe these to all of us, including your husband or wife. You must use your talents and interests.

And you don’t need to be perfect. Or even good. If you love to cook, should you wait to earn a Michelin star before feeding a hungry woman? No! You don’t need to be a concert pianist to make music that helps other folks smile or remember better time. And you don’t need to succeed at every business you launch or every cake you decorate, either.

You just need to do the things that make you feel good and right with the world, because they were gifts, not just to you, but to your family, your neighborhood, and your world.

And wouldn’t it be a shame to refuse (or worse, mock) your spouse’s gifts just because they don’t include the fascinating conversation or physical activity or home improvements you want help with?

About the author

Patty Newbold

I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.

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By Patty Newbold

Patty Newbold

I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.

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