On Tuesday, I revealed a problem sent in by a reader and asked for suggestions from all of you. As she sees it, and I must agree, the problem is how they address their disagreements. Neither is happy with their approach. As an example of the sort of disagreements they are addressing, she offered one spouse asking the other not to interrupt when the other is speaking slowly. As it turns out, this...
If you think there are problems in your marriage, you are probably right. Unless the problems are out of your control and threatening your wellbeing, you won’t move toward a solution by announcing there are problems. Instead, move closer. Look for things to love and admire about your spouse. Take a few extra seconds with your kisses, your compliments, and your thank yous. All three will...
On The Times of India’s View\Counterview page today, there is an interesting issue up for discussion. India’s rural development and water and sanitation minister, Jairam Ramesh, has proposed a “no bathroom, no bride” rule. According to the most recent census, 53% of all Indian households have no toilet. This generally means there is also no septic tank, septic field, or...
I received a great question from a reader not much enjoying her third year of marriage because of a disagreement about how to handle disagreements. The example she gave is requesting not to be interrupted even when she’s speaking slowly. She wants time to get her complete thought out. I suspect the same problem could emerge over other issues you and I have run into, such as a request to...
Let me tell you what my answer to this question was. I believed it was too much to ask. I was married to a good man and a great father, but I felt angry, overworked, stressed out all the time. It definitely felt like too much to ask. I would do whatever it took to make it easier on our son. I even used my experience with unhappily married parents to convince myself divorce was the better of his...
I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.
