“Divorces are mainly caused by too many expectations from the spouse.” Shabana Azmi, actress, activist, and Member of the Indian Parliament’s upper house (the Rajya Sabha), said this Monday at the opening of a premartial counseling center in India’s capital. Although Azmi spoke of Delhi’s mostly arranged marriages, she could have been talking about marriages in the U...
This morning, I read a newspaper columnist’s response to a woman who’s become bored with her 19-year marriage. The woman can’t see any way out of her boredom except to divorce. Unfortunately (or perhaps very fortunately), she could afford to divorce only if she wins the lottery or lands a rich boyfriend, because they are in debt. The columnist suggested she talk to her husband...
I’ve always thought it wonderful that when I married, I married into a family. Both my husbands’ families are now part of my extended family. When my son married eight years ago, my family grew again. In a couple of weeks, I’ll get to meet his mother-in-law and father-in-law, who live in India, in person for the first time. I can’t wait. We share a couple of adorable...
Five years from now, you will be a different person. You will have different interests, different tastes, different challenges. Date, live together, avoid commitment, and you’ll be free to move on to a partner who shares your new interests, matches your new tastes, helps with your new challenges. That’s the choice of many who were exposed to unhappy marriages or divorce while growing...
The folks at Gallup released a poll on Monday about Values and Beliefs. Topping the list of moral acceptability: divorce. Seventy percent rated it morally acceptable. Only twenty-two percent said it was morally unacceptable. But it would be a mistake, I think, to jump to the conclusion that divorce has become no big deal for most of us. At the opposite end of the spectrum of sixteen morality...
I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.
