I was chatting with a couple of friends today. All three of us have had our crazy-making moments in our marriages. Some little change or thoughtless act sends us into a royal panic that makes us wonder if we’re getting a fair shake or if we ought to run for the hills. So we Assume Love, check for loving explanations of the behavior or words that freaked us out, and suddenly see the...
Right before my first husband suddenly up and died, all I could think was, “I love you, but I can’t stand this. I cannot stand my life with you.” I had no idea what to do. The therapist I had seen had no idea what to do. My husband certainly had no idea what to do. It wasn’t until my first morning as a widow that I suddenly knew what to do. May I share it with you? Here it...
This is a guest blog post from Sue Wiygul Martin, whose unfolding story on her new blog should stir anyone who has ever felt depressed, disabled, or bedeviled. It is a celebration of that wonderful moment when we declare our intention to encounter life as a twosome. In Sue’s case, it was clearer than at many weddings how big a challenge that can be. Fortunately for all of us, they are still...
I promised this post a while ago to Ben. He wrote a heart-breaking comment on my Should I Stay Married for the Kids? post. I apologize for how long it’s taken to pull this together. The Situation Ben has a young daughter and a wife he feels he can no longer love. He’s 22 and about to start medical school. He has no time for the emotional ups and downs of a separation and divorce. He...
I’m guessing you have read Gary Chapman’s mega-bestseller, The Five Love Languages, by now. If not, hurry over to your nearest library or log into the Kindle Store today. Knowing these five languages of love (gifts, acts of service, words of affirmation, physical touch, and quality time) will help you appreciate more of the love you’re being given and ask for what you need from...
