Good gifts make me feel loved. But they don’t have this effect on everyone. Some claim there is no good gift: if they really wanted something, they would have already bought it or made it. Others receive gifts and feel long, uncomfortable strings attached. They feel indebted, and almost no gift is special enough to welcome this feeling. People who cannot imagine a good gift or receive a...
If you miss having time for fun together or time to talk, here are three quick ways to find more: Make plans in advance. Come up with something to look forward to or just block out the time for something spontaneous. Do in advance all the things that make it so hard to get out the door (or into the bedroom) for something unplanned. Question your givens. If your spouse is often available when your...
How to make yourself unhappily married: expect anything other than love. Say you expect to hear “I love you” or “You look great today.” Lots of husbands and wives say such things, but yours doesn’t. Does this mean you are not loved or not admired? Probably not. But if you believe it does, you are going to be unhappy. You may be married to one of the millions of...
In Part 3 of this series, I want to address a comment added to Part 1. I want to address it because I remember thinking like the commenter around a dozen years into my first marriage, and it kept me from fixing my marriage or even believing it could be fixed. Here’s the first part of the comment, which Matt wrote but so many others could have, too. Well, since this IS the assume love...
This post is a continuation of Wednesday’s post, in which I asked what Janice should do next. She triggered an emotional outburst from her wife, Katy, with the question, “How much interest are we making on our savings account this year?” The Votes are In Here’s what you thought Janice’s best next move would be : 1 reader chose Defend her question as an innocent one...
