If your wife treats you like part of the furniture or can’t stop telling you how to earn more money, if your husband drives you nuts with his insensitive comments or misplaced laundry, it’s time to round up the usual suspects.
Wow! I spent a week in Atlanta at the 2006 Smart Marriages Conference in June. It was my first one, but the 10th anniversary of this truly remarkable gathering. Organizer Diane Sollee brought together 2,263 people who share the goal of better marriages.
Mike’s watching a baseball game on TV. Melanie wants him to go with her to the nursery to pick out some flowers for the garden. Melanie knows if they don’t go soon, they won’t be able to plant tomorrow. Recently, gardening’s been the one activity they actually enjoy together. She walks into the family room and asks Mike when he’ll be ready to go. He doesn’t...
One of the most widely read and cited books on marriage is The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John M. Gottman, Ph.D., and Nan Silver. Gottman can predict whether a couple will divorce after watching and listening to them for only five minutes. His predictions are correct 91% of the time. He watches for four things as they try to resolve an ongoing disagreement. Here’s what...
So you Assume Love, and you realize that your beloved life partner objects to what you’re asking for only because it conflicts with what he or she wants. Now what? You look together for what Stephen Covey, in The Seven Habits of Highly Successful People, calls The Third Alternative. Commit to getting what you want and let go of the way you first thought of getting it. Ask questions and pay...
