I’ll be gathering with my first husband’s family in a few weeks to celebrate the life of my sister-in-law, who died the same week as my mother earlier this year. It has me thinking about marriage and families. A few months after I met Rod, we drove across the continent to meet his family. The next year, they flew to us for our wedding. We were married for thirteen years before he died...
Recently, I had a stimulating discussion with two highly intelligent and articulate women half my age. One of them introduced me to a new name for having sex with people other than your spouse but with your spouse’s permission: ethical non-monogamy. When I was in high school, swingers was what we called consensual spouses having sex with other partners. They went to sex parties together or...
I am a worrier. A world-class worrier, I suspect. My father taught me well: always ask, “What if?” MIT taught me well: they gave me a degree in Planning. But my native curiosity and imagination were probably more than enough on their own. The other night, I was sitting on the sofa beside my husband when I smelled smoke. I asked him if he smelled it. Nope. But, to humor me and out of a...
If you have always thought you’re winning when you get your way and losing when you don’t, you will need to change your perspective to enjoy being married. If you go along to get along when you disagree with your spouse, you know it puts a little extra distance between the two of you. It’s harder to feel close when you’ve just agreed to something you actually disagree with...
It’s Valentine’s Day, 2022. And the Assume Love blog is now Sweet Sixteen. I published the first post on Valentine’s Day in 2006. I hope that it’s helped you celebrate more happy Valentines Days since then. Happy seventh anniversary to my cousin’s daughter (my first cousin once removed) and her marvelous second husband. What a great choice of wedding days. And (this...
