What makes a marriage fair? A while before my first husband died, I thought it was unfair he wouldn’t take on consulting work, like other professors did. We needed the money. In the months right before his death, I thought it was unfair he wouldn’t accept a semester of disability pay, allowing him to take on more work at home but less work overall with no loss in pay. Then he died...
Some folks scream bloody murder when things don’t go their way in a marriage. Others avoid conflict. Neither works. Both of these involve pulling away from your marriage, distancing yourself from your partner in life. Harder to do, but much more likely to succeed: lean in. Get closer. State your case and affirm your love. Be sexier (not pushier) when you ask for more sex, even if it risks a...
In addition to my work as a Marriage Educator, I have for 35 years been paid to advise managers in major corporations on how to improve employee performance. There’s a strong link between the two. When a company tries to get more or better performance at the expense of an employee’s marriage, it backfires. The latest to make this huge mistake? Those responsible for information...
Fascinating news today from the Air Force Times. While 10.5% of the adult civilian population is divorced, only 4.4% of Air Force officers and 7.3% of enlisted airmen are. Think it’s because they don’t bother to marry, given all that times away from home? That’s not it, according to author Erik Holmes. Airmen are more likely to be married, especially officers. 70.9% of Air Force...
Funniest marriage tip of the month award goes to Slashdot user dotancohen. It comes in reply to a self-reported gaming/Linux geek preparing to marry his literary geek girlfriend. They asked for some more helpful advice than the stuff written for “an alpha-male jock and a submissive cheerleader-style wife.” So dotancohen offers a geekier approach to a happy marriage: “Set up a...
