Best Friends, Respectfully

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Ken Solin, a 50+ guy looking for love, decided to try something new. He wrote about it in the Huffington Post last Wednesday. I think you might find what he said interesting for your own marriage.

I had noticed that in great relationships the partners were also best friends. Alternatively, I had never seen a bad relationship that embraced friendship.

He set out to find a female best friend. And he found one. Notice what he says about getting through the tough spots with her:

When all else fails, we remind each other that best friends treat each other respectfully, particularly when they disagree.

Most of us women would say kindly, gently, lovingly, with forgiveness and concern. Men say respectfully. Women who pay attention to this difference have a much easier time getting the kindness, gentleness, love, forgiveness, and concern they value.

We haven’t failed yet to find workable solutions to our problems, because we truly are friends, and friends always manage to work it out with dignity.

Workable solutions. Work it out. Dignity. Sounds like Third Alternatives to me.
I like this guy.

About the author

Patty Newbold

I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.

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