TagThird Alternatives

Small Annoyances

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Small annoyances can become big marriage problems. What do I mean by small annoyances? Socks on the floor, cap off the toothpaste, water on the counter, putting a milk container with just one ounce of milk back in the refrigerator without buying more or putting it on the shopping list, leaving things on the passenger seat of the car, going missing while you’re shopping, getting out of bed...

Floods that Wipe Out Good Marriages

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Researchers call it “diffuse physiological arousal.” Therapists call it “flooding.” You start out a little bit angry or anxious. Your stress grows. When it reaches the point called “flooding,” you can no longer think clearly about anything except fight (hurting or stopping the person or thing you are upset about) or flight (getting away, even if just inside...

Best Friends, Respectfully

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Ken Solin, a 50+ guy looking for love, decided to try something new. He wrote about it in the Huffington Post last Wednesday. I think you might find what he said interesting for your own marriage. I had noticed that in great relationships the partners were also best friends. Alternatively, I had never seen a bad relationship that embraced friendship. He set out to find a female best friend. And...

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Find a Third Alternative – Step Three

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If you read yesterday’s post, you know that step one in finding a Third Alternative is to jump the net and step two is to write new specs. Now we are ready for step three. Step Three: Brainstorm! Sometimes, one of you can do the brainstorming on your own. You look at your new specs and ideas start popping. Suddenly, there it is. The Third Alternative, the one you will like as much as you...

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