In today’s Seattle Times, marriage advice from seven siblings, all of whom have been married to the same husband or wife for fifty years. Faith Eat together A lot of give and take Family time Stay in touch with close relatives Humor Good cooking Accept each other’s idiosyncrasies How do you manage that give and take? How do you accept each other’s idiosyncracies? How do you find...
Married? Busy? Take Your Spouse’s Calls
White House Press Secretary Dana Perino says her predecessor, Tony Snow, “was the inspiration for her 2008 New Year’s resolution, which was always to take her husband’s telephone calls, no matter how busy she was at work,” according to tomorrow’s New York Times. Tony Snow died today of colon cancer, at age 53, leaving a wife and three children it’s evident he...
Gone Boating
On a beautiful summer afternoon like this one, I recall the pleasures of boating. I want to get out on the water. My husband does not. Am I being cheated? Is there something wrong with my marriage? Not at all. We promised to love each other “in sickness and in health,” not “by boat and by bicycle.” Our marriage is just fine. He’s a handy companion, and I love...
35th Wedding Anniversary
Today is the 35th anniversary of the day I got married. It was a gorgeous Spring day, and we married, surrounded by lilacs in bloom and our closest friends and relatives, in the garden behind Henry Wadsworth Longfellow’s Cambridge home. Would we still be married now, if I knew then to Assume Love, Expect Love, and Find Third Alternatives? If we had been able to stay close through those...
Doing What Your Spouse Doesn’t Want You to Do
You want to work, take a class, quit your job, stay in touch with your friends, get your exercise by dancing, offer a relative a place to stay for the night. Your husband or wife isn’t happy about this. What do you do? First, remember to Expect Love. It’s what you’re married for. You need it. But when you demand love come in a particular package, you chase it away. Don’t...