When the person who promised to love you and cherish you as long as you both live says something hurtful, it can be so hard not to take it personally. And this is why you must Assume Love. Assume Love does not mean anything like your colleague at work saying: “You must have misheard him. I’m sure he didn’t mean to hurt you. Just forget he ever said it. I’m sure things will...
Expect love. It’s beautiful and surprising and nothing like you thought it would be. No one’s going to put in this sort of effort for a guy who has been whining he expected his wife would serve dinner on time (or pick up his dry cleaning or stop working when the baby came) if she really loved him… Your spouse wants to love you. It’s a lot harder when you want to dictate...
At the end of my post The Strength of Strengths, I wrote: Just being aware of our different strengths lets me see two virtues clashing. It gives me a chance to look beyond my own strength and ask how I might be an even better (and happier) person with both our strengths at my disposal. Recently, a kind reader, Lindsey, left a comment on that post: I get, and really identify with, these sorts of...
I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.
