We all have our love languages. Before we can talk, we discover the ones that work for us. And before we know it, we’re married to someone with a different love language.
Sure, you could try to explain to your mate how to love you your way, but my approach is a whole lot easier and more likely to feel like you’re being loved:
- Gift lover married to a quality time giver? Transition into your conversation or joint activity with a bit of ceremony. Take the time to see the big bow wrapped around this gift of connection. Unwrap it slowly and step into your gift.
- Quality time lover committed to a physical touch giver? Sign the two of you up for a massage class together. Schedule a sensual weekend getaway. Take up ballroom or salsa dancing.
- Physical touch lover partnered with an acts of service giver? Ask for sexual favors, hand or face massage, hugs, and kisses. They feel more loving to your mate when done as an act of service, odd as this might sound to you. You’ll feel the extra love.
- Acts of service lover loved by an affirming words giver? Listen to the words carefully. Hear them as a poem written just for you. As you read that greeting card, picture your mate going to the store, selecting just the right sentiment, adding that little extra touch, and making sure to present it to you at the right moment to have the most effect. These are acts of service.
- Affirming words lover with a gift giver? Pay attention to the card that comes with the gift. Pay attention to the words with which it is presented, because gift givers delight in presenting gifts to their beloved. If the gift is given silently, ask something as simple as, “Is this for me?” The answer may be worth even more to you than the gift.
Those are but a few of the possible combinations. What would you recommend to an affirming words lover who wants to discover more of the love offered by his or her quality time giver?