Rejection is no fun. When we get rejected, we make note of why and try to avoid a repeat. Over time, this leaves us with a distorted view of our husband or wife, because a good percentage of rejections have nothing to do with us or what we asked for. The distortion keeps us from even suggesting things we would enjoy. It prevents us from offering some great Third Alternatives when we disagree, too...
Interesting results from a study that followed 634 couples through the first nine years of their marriage: a big difference in how much they drink greatly increased their chances of divorce. About half of the couples with one heavy drinker and one who is not a heavy drinker divorced within nine years of their wedding day. Those who were more alike in their drinking had around a 30% divorce rate...
I am a widow who got it right the second time. I have been sharing here since February 14, 2006 what I learned from that experience and from positive psychology, marriage research, and my training as a marriage educator.
